American - Journalist | July 3, 1947 -
Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
Dave Barry
DanceYouNobodyNobody CaresUp
If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'
PotentialMeetingsYouAchieveWhy
Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.
SportsFunSkiingFaceTreesDown
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
WaterBeerBadWayWithoutExample
Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.
JanuaryFootballToughSharksGames
Snowboarding is an activity that is very popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is lethal enough.
PeopleSkiingFeelEnoughActivity
Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.
TimeHolidayChoiceChristmasWay
Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.
StupidBelieveNowBreastsFunction
The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers.
AgeReligionBelieveGenderHuman
We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but we cannot figure out how it travels inside wires.
BelieveElectricityInsideCompany
The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
FunnyWaterFireBuildingUniverse
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.
FishingFishYouBoringCatchThen
Copyright © 2024 QuotesDict Dave Barry quotes