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Dave Barry Quotes

American - Journalist | July 3, 1947 -

For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.

Me Golf Worst Always Ball Playing

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.

Death Fashion Street Falling Through

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.

Death Forward Look Followed

I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.

Purpose I Am Computers Person Only

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.

Religion People Writing Problem You

Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.

Relationship You Never Assume Guy

There is a breed of fashion models who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary.

Fashion More Dictionary Who Than

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula.

Fear Child More Afraid Example Than

If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry.

God Cute Us Would Made He

In fact, when you get right down to it, almost every explanation Man came up with for anything until about 1926 was stupid.

Man Stupid You Down Right Anything

Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you can repeat words! And they don't even have to be true!

Job Words Think Wish You Be True

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