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Ron White Quotes

American - Comedian | December 18, 1956 -

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.

Life Funny Believe You Find Party

I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.

Silent Right Ability Had Remain

We always go out looking for live music after our shows.

Live Music Looking Go Always Out

Donald Trump - and I don't dislike Donald one single bit - has no idea how good the Mexican people are at building tunnels.

Good People Building Donald Trump

There's not a pill you can take; there's not a class you can go to. Stupid is forever.

Stupid You Go Class Forever Take

I didn't get where I am today by worryin' about how I'd feel tomorrow.

Wisdom Today I Am Tomorrow Feel Get

I go to more open mic nights than open mikers.

Go More Open Mic Than Nights

Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty... mine's putting in an express lane.

Death Trying Death Penalty Lane Mine

The only way to stay sharp is to do live shows. There is no part-time comedy.

Live Comedy Way Sharp Stay Only

People are saying that I'm an alcoholic, and that's not true, because I only drink when I work, and I'm a workaholic.

Work People Saying True Drink Only

I was considered by my peers to be a good comedian. So that's all I ever strived to do was get some recognition from my peers.

Good Recognition Peers Get Some

Any time someone achieves success before they've earned it, it always comes back to haunt them.

Success Time Someone Back Always

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