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Woody Allen Quotes

American - Director | December 1, 1935 -

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

Parents Action Out Room Kidnapped

Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

Down Done Lying Dying Things Few

The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't have.

Talent Happy You Being Happy Being

I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Death Die Want Afraid Just Happens

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.

God You Atheist Opposition Loyal

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

You Dressed Happen Fine Nothingness

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Death I Am Want Afraid Just Happens

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.

Government Believe I Believe Watching

As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.

Nature God Tree Said Hard Out

I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.

Life Funny Change I Am Believe Am

I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.

Live Parents Me Think Bear Teddy

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

Television Garbage Beverly Hills Away

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