Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet.
Richard M. Nixon
GoBathroomToiletNickelSoviet
I, made in England, felt excluded, miffed, resistant to the idea of even visiting India, a position of increasing absurdity as, one by one, backpacking friends returned from the place with the standard anecdotal combo of nirvanic epiphany and toilet horror.
Glen Duncan
FriendsIndiaPlaceHorrorToilet
You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.
Alan King
LiveYouToiletYearsLastSpend
I don't think my daughter wants to see me on the toilet. Lila has seen me nude.
Kate Moss
DaughterMeThinkToiletSeeSeen
I've fixed the toilet. And I've been crawling in claustrophobic places... you have to deal with that when you become a homeowner.
J. B. Pritzker
YouPlacesBecomeToiletDealBeen
I like getting toilet paper thrown at me.
Joel Madden
MeToiletPaperLikeThrownGetting
As a wheelchair user, I am utterly obsessed with toilets, and all my friends know it. A simple invitation to the pub is consistently followed by, 'Do you know if they have an accessible toilet?'
Stella Young
SimpleI AmFriendsYouKnowToilet
If you can market smut and toilet paper, you can market movies.
Dawn Steel
YouMoviesToiletPaperMarket
If you're embarking around the world in a hot-air balloon, don't forget the toilet paper.
Richard Branson
WorldYouForgetBalloonToilet
I love 'Sky Whale!' I play it in bed, I play it in church, I even play it on the toilet!
GloZell
LoveSkyChurchBedPlayToilet
I really can't be bothered going to a barber. And shaving every morning, that's nightmarish. I spent my teenage years covered in tiny little bits of toilet paper.
Alan Moore
MorningBarberShavingToiletYears
You can flush my ashes down the toilet, for all I care.
Carolyn Gold Heilbrun
CareYouDownToiletAshesI Care
Well, I don't use the toilet much to pee in. I almost always pee in the yard or the garden, because I like to pee on my estate.
Iggy Pop
GardenAlwaysToiletWellAlmost
I married a man who isn't afraid to wash a dish, scrub a toilet, or have his unibrow waxed into submission by a licensed professional.
Jen Lancaster
ManProfessionalToiletAfraidWash
Me and my sisters were so awful. One nanny, we loved, but we hacked her email and sent her boyfriend lots of weird messages, and we once actually locked her in the toilet, too.
Suki Waterhouse
MeLovedWeirdToiletEmailHer
House Republicans are flimsier than toilet paper, except toilet paper actually has use. They're so pathetic.
Corey Stewart
HouseToiletPaperPatheticThan
For some reason, the only Swedish I know how to say is, 'There is no toilet paper.'
Morfydd Clark
KnowSayReasonToiletPaperOnly
It's not hard to tell we was poor - when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline.
George Lindsey
YouPoorHardToiletTellSaw
Here in the Netherlands there are towns that take part in the throwing of toilet bowls for a laugh.
Willem-Alexander of the Netherlands
LaughToiletTakeHerePartBowls
From the stage I've seen people of all ages absolutely roaring at really good toilet humour.
Adrian Edmondson
GoodPeopleToiletStageHumour
I told CBS, 'My career is going down the toilet, and you're pulling the chain.'
Flip Wilson
YouCareerDownToiletGoingChain
When somebody follows you 20 blocks to the pharmacy, where they watch you buy toilet paper, you know your life has changed.
Jennifer Aniston
LifeYouKnowToiletBuyWatch
Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience!
Tommy Cooper
MarriageWifeToiletConvenience
Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet.
Chuck Palahniuk
GodPetDownToiletJustMaybe
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