American - Comedian | May 13, 1964 -
I'm not just a pundit - I'm a comedian.
Stephen Colbert
JustComedian
Simply being a guest on David Letterman's show has been a highlight of my career. I never dreamed that I would follow in his footsteps, though everyone in late night follows Dave's lead. I'm thrilled and grateful that CBS chose me. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go grind a gap in my front teeth.
GratefulMeNightYouCareerGrind
The first time I met Jon Stewart was at the press conference that Comedy Central held to announce Jon would be the new host of 'The Daily Show,' which back then was not called 'The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.'
DailyTimeComedyBackNewFirst
My favorite off-camera memory of Jon Stewart is watching him jump from the second level of a tuna tower into the waters off Grand Cayman.
MemoryJumpWatchingHimTowerOff
We are thrilled that Jon Batiste is joining 'The Late Show' family of products. For my money, nobody plays like Jon Batiste. And you can trust me, because it is my money.
FamilyTrustMoneyMeYouLate
I'm a junkie for exhaustion, and I'm a junkie for setting up my expectations too high and then trying to meet them.
ExpectationsTryingMeetHighUp
I liked comedy as a kid. When I was a kid, I'd go to sleep to, like, Bill Cosby albums every night. I'd listen to 'Bill Cosby Is A Very Funny Fellow... Right!' and 'Wonderfulness,' which are two of his most famous albums. Then the next night, I'd flip them over, 'cause it was the old stackable turntable.
FunnySleepNightFamousComedyGo
I loved George Carlin and Dean Martin. I was one of those kids who had every comedy album.
LovedComedyWhoKidsAlbumThose
I have a doctorate in fine arts from Knox College in Illinois. All I did was give a speech, and now everybody has to call me Dr. Colbert.
CollegeMeSpeechNowCallArts
I have tender feelings for Nixon because everybody has warm feelings about their childhood. Actually, I didn't like the Watergate trials 'cause they interrupted 'The Munsters.'
ChildhoodWarmFeelingsTrialsLike
I started as a straight actor. I'd go onstage, and I'd think, 'Wow, this is the only thing I want to work really hard at. I will rehearse fifty times on a single scene; I don't care - I'll do it again.'
WorkThinkCareGoWantActor
You can't really be passionately moderate. It's like wearing an 'Extra Medium' - it doesn't exist.
YouExistExtraLikeModerate
Copyright © 2024 QuotesDict Stephen Colbert quotes