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Patton Oswalt Quotes

American - Comedian | January 27, 1969 -

I mean, all alternative comedy is are comedians that have being doing it for so long, for so long, that they were relaxed enough to start becoming personal on stage.

Start Comedy Doing Enough Long Mean

I hate all sidekicks.

I have some shorter stories coming out in other books early next year. I might be pitching a re-vamp of Ghost Rider in the spring. We'll see.

Spring Year Early Pitching See Out

I'm not familiar with the metric system.

System Metric Familiar

I remember, when 9/11 went down, my reaction was, 'Well, I've had it with humanity.' But I was wrong.

Remember Humanity Down Wrong Well

We would not be here if humanity were inherently evil. We'd have eaten ourselves alive long ago.

Evil Long Humanity Alive Here Would

As unhealthy as I am, I'm weirdly aware of exactly how my body functions.

I Am Body Aware How Am Unhealthy

I think the kind of person that gravitates toward New York is a person that's not so much focused on controlling exactly how they appear and how they exit. They're more fascinated with the process.

New York Think Process Person New

You know, in Los Angeles, you're constantly in your car, you're sealed up, you're not walking around. Whereas in New York, after a while, all your stuff is kind of public, in one way or the other. I'm not saying either one of those is bad; they're both great for a very specific kind of comedian. And I'm glad that they both exist.

Car Great New York Saying Walking

I'm still very much an atheist, except that I don't necessarily see religion as being a bad thing. So, that's a weird thing that I'm struggling with that seems to be offending both atheists and people that are religious.

Religion People Weird Bad Atheist

With acting, you see some of the kids are literally just off the street, untrained, and they are great. And others are off the street, untrained, and kind of horrible.

Great You Acting Kind Street See

In my mind, I was always a comedian who was going to branch into writing.

Mind Writing Always Going Who

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