American - Comedian | February 7, 1956 -
In our school you were searched for guns and knifes on the way in and if you didn't have any, they gave you some.
Emo Philips
SchoolYouWayGunsOurSome
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
FunnyFriendDoorKidNext
Actually, my cd was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist.
TwoReturnDutchActuallyGermanCD
England is better only because I stand out there as 'unusual'.
StandBetterOutBecauseUnusual
My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe.
CopySafeJokesHeadWhereBritish
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