David Letterman Quotes

Dick Cheney said he was running again. He said his health was fine, 'I've got a doctor with me 24 hours a day.' Yeah, that's always the sign of a man in good health, isn't it?

David Letterman

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Topics

GoodGood HealthHealthDayManMe

The Four Levels of Comedy: Make your friends laugh, Make strangers laugh, Get paid to make strangers laugh, and Make people talk like you because it's so much fun.

Jerry Seinfeld

FunPeopleLaughComedyFriendsYou

For the readers out there, if your girlfriend says she's having a girls' weekend, do not show up with a bottle of rose. No one wants to see your face there.

Jessica St. Clair

RoseFaceWeekendSheSeeOut

Everybody pursues their national interests. The only one who gets blamed for it is the United States.

John Bolton

UnitedOnlyWhoUnited StatesStates

I think I am a religious person just by nature. I think I sort of view everything through the lens of some inner undying thing in people that drives them to act as they do or to feel ashamed of not acting in some other way.

John Darnielle

NatureI AmPeopleThinkFeelView

I do like strong women in my movies. I have five sisters, so I've just grown up with that model.

Robert Rodriguez

WomenStrongMoviesStrong WomenUp

When in doubt, punt!

John Heisman

DoubtWhen In Doubt

Every leader needs to clearly explain the top three things the organization is working on. If you can't, then you're not leading well.

Jeffrey R. Immelt

LeaderOrganizationYouThreeTop

Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win.

Stephen King

LiveWinSometimesInsideRealUs

I'm not a god, I'm just a simple guy.

Tommy Wiseau

GodSimpleGuyJust

The world is always reinventing itself, and so should you. I used to say, 'I haven't started yet.' Sadly, most people don't develop their potential.

Ron Moody

PeopleWorldPotentialYouSayUsed

All along, I've been writing about our fears, our longings, our fantasies, our ambivalences. When I decided to study psychoanalysis, I did it because I wanted to understand the psychodynamics of it all. Though far from perfect, psychoanalysis offered me a huge, wonderful window on all that.

Judith Viorst

MeWindowWritingPerfectUnderstand

Clearly, many branches of science need an exquisite precision of timekeeping and the infinitesimal decimals of calibration, so space launches, for example, are not scheduled for leap-second dates. But society as a whole neither needs that obsessive time measurement nor is well served by it.

Jay Griffiths

ScienceTimeSpaceSocietyNeed

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