Jon Stewart Quotes

Here's the point - you're looking at affirmative action, and you're looking at marijuana. You legalize marijuana, no need for quotas, because really, who's gonna wanna work?

Jon Stewart

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Topics

WorkLookingActionYouNeedPoint

Blue Tongue Films is a very important part of my life.

Joel Edgerton

LifeBlueMy LifeTongueImportant

Political commercials encourage the deceptive, the destructive and the degrading.

John O'Toole

PoliticalEncourageDestructive

I don't get any dates; that's the thing.

Sophie Turner

GetDatesAnyThing

I was first hired at Staples in 1992, by company founder Tom Stemberg and eventual CEO Ron Sargent, to be the first director of marketing and merchandising for the catalog business.

Shira Goodman

BusinessMarketingFirstDirector

I don't mind dying if I have to, but I'm damned if I want to pay for the guarantee. I'm sorry.

Michael Landon

MindSorryWantDyingPayGuarantee

Now, let me be clear. The path I lay out is not one paved with ever increasing government checks and cradle to grave assurance that government will always be the solution. If this election is a bidding war for who can promise the most goodies and the most benefits, I'm not your president. You have that president today.

Mitt Romney

TodayPathGovernmentWarMeYou

Restless, and in desperate need of adventure, I quit my job at an insurance company to travel west with a couple of guys I smoked pot with, scandalizing my family.

Mink Stole

FamilyJobTravelAdventureQuit

I guess there's only two possible places ideas can come from. One is the outside: everything that happens to you and everything that you do in life. And the other is the inside part: your own personality and imagination, and no two people are alike, like fingerprints.

Lloyd Alexander

LifePersonalityImaginationIdeas

I have no ambitions beyond being comfortable in what I do for a living - and earning a living.

Craig Ferguson

LivingComfortableBeyondEarning

We see less of Dave, certainly, and he's kind of fallen out of the sphere of our group, mostly because he's working on his show, and has kind of lost the fun of the party.

Bruce McCulloch

FunPartyLostKindGroupSee

You can enjoy stargazing just by going out and learning a couple constellations with your kids.

Tim Ferriss

LearningEnjoyYouOutGoingKids

Tanks being deployed far forward is an indication of offensive action; tanks in depth is an indication of defensive action.

Norman Schwarzkopf

ActionForwardDepthOffensiveBeing

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