Matt Besser Quotes

Often, when people don't do so well in a monologue at UCB, it's because they're racking their brain so hard to be funny that they're just not honest and don't just tell a true story, which is what we want.

Matt Besser

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

  • Author Profession: actor
  • Nationality: american
  • Birth: September 22, 1967

Topics

FunnyPeopleBrainStoryWantTrue

Learning how to walk again was a process for me. It was some of the darker days of my life, but I've had many moments of my life where I've had to just kind of put my head down and work, and this was no different.

Jimmy Graham

LifeWorkLearningWalkMeMy Life

You might not think of something like TurboTax as a civic venture, but that product took a confusing interface to a government process and made it simpler and easier to use for citizens.

Jennifer Pahlka

GovernmentThinkProcessYouProduct

It's becoming much more common to see yoga studios offer classes aimed exclusively at people of color who are searching for ways to cope with racism and fears around police brutality.

Jenna Wortham

PoliceRacismPeopleColorMoreSee

I am a clinical zombie.

Andy Biersack

I AmZombieClinicalAm

I believe that sometimes, when we talk about books, we're talking about the big picture - how they're relevant.

Meg Wolitzer

BelievePictureTalkingSometimes

Man, your head is haunted; you have wheels in your head! You imagine great things, and depict to yourself a whole world of gods that has an existence for you, a spirit-realm to which you suppose yourself to be called, an ideal that beckons to you. You have a fixed idea!

Max Stirner

GreatManYourselfWorldYouHead

To me, discipline in football occurs on the field, not off it.

John Madden

DisciplineFootballMeOffField

Not that I'm some rocker, but what I do in a show is probably far more aggressive than what Dean Martin or Bobby Darin ever did.

Michael Buble

AggressiveMoreShowFarThanSome

I would say the first concert I ever went to is my earliest memory. I was four and already obsessed with Michael Jackson. We were living in Munich at the time. My mom, being the best person ever, somehow managed to get us two tickets to the '97 Michael Jackson History World Tour.

Amber Mark

HistoryTimeBestMemoryMomWorld

Here's what my CV usually does not say: I was trained as a teacher. My first job lasted less than 60 days. I was an assistant professor at a good college at Delhi University, but I found it very political, very suffocating. At the age of 23, you're not very tolerant of those things.

Amit Bhatia

GoodAgeTeacherJobCollegeYou

One day a guy tried to rob me on the street, and I had no money. So I charged him.

Steven Wright

MoneyDayMeStreetOne DayHim

One of the strongest features of Puritanism is its autobiographical tendency, its passionate self-regard.

Tom Paulin

PassionatePuritanismAutobiographical

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