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Dane Cook Quotes

American - Comedian | March 18, 1972 -

When people refer to 'Back in the Day,' it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.

Day Fun People You Back Wednesday

I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.

Funny Think Better I Can Always Get

We all hope for breakthrough rebirth moments.

Hope Moments Breakthrough Rebirth

I'm shooting a pilot based on my show. It's a one-camera show. I play myself.

Myself Play Pilot Shooting Show

I can do more than just stand-up comedy, and the only way I'll be able to show that is if I do it myself. Because nobody trusts that I can do it.

Myself Comedy I Can Nobody Way More

When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer.

Comedy Doing You Sometimes Director

I say it with my tongue firmly planted in cheek but there's truth to it - being a comedian is very close to being a therapist. When you're working smaller clubs, you're listening. You're feeling an energy, you're going with a tone but when people start yelling out, you almost start a conversation with people.

Truth People Listening Start Energy

My mom and dad passed away from cancer. Within nine months, I lost both of my folks. Immediately after that, I had a horrible betrayal where my brother, who worked for me, stole a lot of my money. He's in jail now.

Money Brother Me Mom Betrayal Lost

I'm glad that my parents missed one thing that was really unbelievable. They saw me hit this great success. It was a blast and we had a lot of laughs. And it was just an amazing time. They passed away. And then after I got, you know, famous, all these haters came out of nowhere.

Success Great Time Parents Amazing

I'm a late-night guy.

I always wanted to be a snake. Every time I saw a snake on TV. I'd always say 'Why not me?'

Time Me Snake Say Why Always

Here's the thing about Red Sox fans, or actually just fans from that region, in general: they appreciate the effort. And if you mail it in or if you give 80 percent, even with a win, they'll let you know that's not how you do it. They want - if it's comedian, if it's a musician, bring us your best show.

Best Red Effort Win Appreciate You

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