American - Comedian | May 29, 1903 - July 27, 2003
You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
Bob Hope
BirthdayCakeYouGetting OldKnow
If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
WorkSportsFunGameGolfYou
If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.
PatriotismEggCountryLay
People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
LovePeopleLazyKissesThrowWho
If you haven't got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.
HeartCharityYouTroubleChristmas
I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.
HumorTearsLaughSeenSomething
A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
GoodHeartHumorYouBurnSense
She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.
DirectionHelpSaidSheForty
The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.
SoupChickenIsraelOnlyAbout
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
MoneyYouPlaceProveWillNeed
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things - not the great occasions - that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
HappinessGreatPastGlowFindGive
I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.
FunnyLoveMoneyGoWashingtonOnly
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