Dave Attell Quotes

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin.

Dave Attell

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

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FishDietYouKnowChickenEat

I really was bullied badly in school.

Jessie James Decker

SchoolBulliedReallyBadly

I am a theatre actor, but the last ten years I've taken parts in movies because it keeps me in money.

Michael Gambon

MoneyI AmMeTheatreMoviesActor

I use my sport and my talent as a tool to spread God's word. Whatever I get out of it, all glory goes to Him.

Tua Tagovailoa

GodTalentGloryHimWhateverOut

Donald Trump has shown no interest in working toward increasing the minimum wage, no interest in doing anything but immigrant baiting, no interest in doing anything but filling the swamp with a band of billionaires who are simply trying to help the wealthy.

Tom Perez

DoingHelpTryingDonald TrumpBand

For me, my career has never been about what I've done. But it's been about becoming, achieving, and pushing myself further.

Rodney Crowell

MyselfMeCareerDoneAchieving

Everybody I know is a joke writer.

Ron White

KnowJokeWriterEverybody

I could have seen myself going into academia, but I don't love it; I just like it.

Mira Sorvino

LoveMyselfSeenGoingJustLike

When I was growing up, chocolate milk was a treat, and the chocolate milk that ended up in a bowl of Cocoa Puffs when I had those for breakfast was the biggest treat of all.

Johnny Iuzzini

BreakfastGrowing UpTreatChocolate

You see, I was born in the slums, that was before the ghetto. The ghetto was kind of refined; the slums was right there on the ground.

Della Reese

YouBornGhettoKindRightSee

I'm a shabby dresser.

Chuck Feeney

ShabbyDresser

The more afraid we are of the shadow of racism, the more conscious we might become of our own unsuspected biases.

Bret Stephens

RacismShadowBecomeMoreAfraid

Drinking when we are not thirsty and making love at all seasons, madam: that is all there is to distinguish us from other animals.

Pierre Beaumarchais

LoveSeasonsAnimalsThirstyUs

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