Retta Quotes

I know that meeting a black woman with a love for hockey is a bit like stumbling upon a unicorn in the woods... or a unicorn anywhere. I'm sure it'd be just as surreal finding a unicorn in downtown Chicago. But here I am.

Retta

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Topics

LoveWomanI AmWoodsHockeyBlack

There are so many low points with stand-up. You are perpetually humiliated, so it doesn't really matter anymore. I don't have any dignity left to lose. An audience can't hurt you anymore when you've been completely dismantled.

John Oliver

HurtYouLoseDignityMatterLow

It's very easy to relate to a kid who is having trouble in high school... less so to relate to a billionaire whose Lamborghini broke down.

Tom Holland

SchoolHigh SchoolEasyDownTrouble

I'd always want to decorate my bedroom. I needed visuals and to be stimulated by things. I'm still like that. It's the way I see the world.

Rob Zombie

WorldWantWayBedroomAlwaysSee

There are smart people on our side of the aisle who have known as early as I did who Obama was and should have been saying 'I hope this guy fails' right along with me. There should have been opposition to this guy all along.

Rush Limbaugh

HopeSmartPeopleMeSayingEarly

Islam is a dangerous religion.

Michel Houellebecq

ReligionDangerousIslam

I feel like we need more aggression today.

Ludacris

TodayFeelMoreNeedAggression

Censure is the tax a man pays to the public for being eminent.

Jonathan Swift

ManTaxBeingPublicEminentPays

I've thought about bringing my children to retrace my own steps of the morning of September 11, 2001, but they're too young for that. Maybe when they're twenty. Maybe by then, even though it's been only a short subway ride away for years now, I'll have the nerve to see the 9-11 memorial for the first time.

Douglas Brunt

MorningChildrenTimeRideThought

You could waterboard me for days - for years - and I would still be cracking jokes about how bad Rachel Maddow is.

Tim Kennedy

MeYouBadYearsJokesDays

Old is when people compliment your alligator shoes, and you're not wearing any.

Norm Crosby

ShoesPeopleYouComplimentOldAny

The fundamentals that founded our great nation included the freedom of speech and religion.

Markwayne Mullin

FreedomGreatReligionSpeechNation

There's nothing more satisfying than seeing a happy and smiling child. I always help in any way I can, even if it's just by signing an autograph. A child's smile is worth more than all the money in the world.

Lionel Messi

SmileMoneyHappyChildWorldHelp

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