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Chelsea Handler Quotes

I was tortured, and probably half of it was deserved, but I was bullied - so much so that there were days when I was like, 'I can't go to school today.' I was too scared.

Chelsea Handler

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Author Profession: comedian
Nationality: american
Birth: February 25, 1975

Topics

Today School Go Days Scared Half

Comedy is a very rough beat. It's no holds barred, as it should be.

Joan Rivers

Comedy Beat Rough Should Very Holds

I hated Woody Woodpecker and Scooby-Doo, but I was a cartoon freak.

John Goodman

Freak Cartoon Hated Woody

One only has to look at the performance of the economy to understand how it shapes the perspective of America's youth about military service.

John M. McHugh

Service Perspective Youth Performance

Every day is bizarre.

Mia Kirshner

Day Every Day Every Bizarre

At Translation, we pride ourselves on being one of the most diverse agencies in the industry - and with that diversity comes a wealth of different talents and perspectives. The onus is on us to empower our employees to use those considerable talents to create real systemic change.

Steve Stoute

Change Diversity Pride Employees

Futurism today is led by science-fiction writers, by sociologists, by historians. Now, I have nothing against them. I'm sure they do great work. But they're not scientists. They're clueless.

Michio Kaku

Work Today Great Now Nothing Sure

One time I happened to use the word 'denigrate' onstage, and it didn't get any reaction. So as I continued my act, the left side of my brain was fast-forwarding to see if I had any other big words coming up.

Bob Newhart

Time Words Brain Reaction See Big

The MVP award was very satisfying in terms of personal accomplishments, but the championship was the most important thing of all.

Bob Cousy

Award Important Personal Championship

If you deny people their own voice, you'll have no idea of who they were.

Alice Walker

People Voice You Own Idea Who

If everybody became a poet the world would be much better. We would all read to each other.

Nikki Giovanni

World Better Poet Would Read Much

There is no better protection against the euro crisis than successful structural reforms in southern Europe.

Mario Draghi

Better Crisis Europe Protection Than

Wellcome Collection will be an exciting place in which to explore themes of human well-being, starting with the powerful collections of Sir Henry Wellcome.

Mark Walport

Powerful Place Well-Being Will Human