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P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

American - Comedian | November 14, 1947 -

We Americans, who invented traffic, are always being startled by the forms into which it has evolved around the world.

World Traffic Always Being Who

To blame the existence of al Qaeda on poverty like Egypt's is a slur on the poor.

Blame Poverty Egypt Poor Existence

The Communist bloc of old was a study in the failure of failure. Losers in the Soviet economy were the people at the end of the long lines for consumer goods. Worse losers were the people who had spent hours getting to the head of the line, only to be told that the goods were unavailable.

Failure People End Long Old Economy

Voting has proliferated in the United States, and it has reached a point where there is now almost one vote available per citizen over the age of eighteen.

Age Voting Now Citizen Vote Over

Of course, no one wants to ban the vote. Voting should remain available for sporting and recreational purposes. But certain types of votes clearly should be curtailed - 'assault votes,' for example, in which the only purpose of the vote is to harm others.

Purpose Voting Vote Others Clearly

What Enron was doing, what caused investors to embrace it in a rapture of baffled awe, was hiding debt.

Doing Debt Embrace Awe Hiding Enron

Our regulatory bodies strive to create honest dealings, fair trades, and a situation in which no one has an advantage over anyone else. But human beings aren't honest. And all trades are made because one person thinks he's getting the better of the other, and the other person thinks the same.

Better Situation Create Person Human

Passover is my idea of a perfect holiday. Dear God, when you're handing out plagues of darkness, locusts, hail, boils, flies, lice, frogs, and cattle murrain, and turning the Nile to blood and smiting the firstborn, give me a pass. And tell me when it's over.

God Darkness Me You Perfect Holiday

Israel is slightly smaller than New Jersey. Moses in effect led the tribes of Israel out of the District of Columbia, parted Chesapeake Bay near Annapolis, and wandered for forty years in Delaware.

New Forty Years Out Israel Jersey

The Bible is very clear about one thing: Using politics to create fairness is a sin.

Politics Bible Fairness Create Sin

Adam Smith is misread as being amoral precisely because people don't read his first book, because they don't read 'The Theory of Moral Sentiments.'

People Book Moral First Theory Read

There is no virtue in compulsory government charity, and there is no virtue in advocating it. A politician who portrays himself as 'caring' and 'sensitive' because he wants to expand the government's charitable programs is merely saying that he's willing to try to do good with other people's money.

Good Money Government Caring People

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