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P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

American - Comedian | November 14, 1947 -

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

Car Power Money Government Giving

Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.

Love Power Ignorance Stupidity Greed

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.

Children Parenting People Who Raise

The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it.

Work Politics Government You Party

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

Good Death Die You Look Will

The 20th century was a test bed for big ideas - fascism, communism, the atomic bomb.

Ideas Communism Bed Test Atomic Bomb

Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand, such as working for a living.

People Long Living Understand Things

The problem with public school is not overcrowding in the classroom. The problem is not teacher unions. The problem is not underfunding or lack of computer equipment. The problem is your damn kids.

Teacher School Problem Damn Unions

The minute somebody joins a committee... they immediately suffer from committee brain. They become wildly over-enthusiastic, over-optimistic, over-pessimistic. Committees turn people into idiots, and politics is a committee.

Politics People Brain Become Turn

Politics is the attempt to achieve power and prestige without merit.

Power Politics Achieve Without Merit

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

Funny Important More Cleanliness

If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat - in other words, turn you into an adult.

New Year's Health Great Words Mind

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