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John Oliver Quotes

British - Comedian | April 23, 1977 -

When you're doing stand-up, you want to stand onstage and, to the extent that you can, uncomplicatedly entertain.

Stand Doing You Want Entertain

There are some people who watch NASCAR for the highly skilled driving - but most people watch it for the crashes.

People Driving Some People Watch Who

My family is from Liverpool, so I have some of those vowel sounds, I've got the slack tone of someone from Birmingham, and then I was raised in Bedford, which is just north of London. So my accent, if it's possible, makes even less sense to a Brit than to an American.

Family American Someone Possible Got

The British press are a group of unremitting scumbags. And sometimes they use that scumbaggery to good ends, and often not.

Good Sometimes Group British Press

There are two kinds of hecklers: the destructive and constructive hecklers.

Two Kinds Destructive Constructive

I would never heckle someone. That's why I think I'm so interested in someone that would.

Think Someone Why Never Would

I watch one news channel until my soul can't take it anymore. It's the background of my life.

Life Soul My Life My Soul News Take

Politicians don't really bring up religion in England.

Religion Politicians Up Bring Really

I'm British; pessimism is my wheelhouse.

British Pessimism

In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup, you don't really want to be listening to what somebody is saying; you want to project your jokes into their face.

Relationship People Listening Saying

I do one accent - my own. I can make it louder or quieter. That is the sum total of my vocal range. I thought I could do an American accent until I tried it in front of an American - the expression of horror is still burnt onto my retinas.

Thought American I Can Horror My Own

Sometimes it's good to remember how bad food can be, so you can enjoy the concept of flavour to the fullest.

Good Food Remember Enjoy You Bad

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