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Evan Esar Quotes

American - Writer | 1899 - 1995

Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.

Place Zoo Human Study Human Beings

A signature always reveals a man's character - and sometimes even his name.

Character Man Name Sometimes Always

Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it.

Home Woman Nobody Done She Unless

Character is what you have left when you've lost everything you can lose.

Character You Lose Lost Everything

Hope is tomorrow's veneer over today's disappointment.

Today Hope Tomorrow Disappointment

Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.

Business Science Facts Statistics

Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits than under analysis some of them won't stand up either.

Business Lie Man Stand Up Stand Up

The mint makes it first, it is up to you to make it last.

You First Up Mint Last Make

The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.

Future Girl Past Man

A hamburger by any other name costs twice as much.

Name Hamburger Twice Costs Much Any

A husband is like a fire - he goes out when unattended.

Fire Husband Out Like He Goes

America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.

Work Education Money America Year

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