American - Sociologist | June 7, 1945 -
A sister is like yourself in a different movie, a movie that stars you in a different life.
Deborah Tannen
LifeStarsYourselfSisterYouLike
In some ways, siblings, and especially sisters, are more influential in your childhood than your parents.
ChildhoodParentsMoreYourThan
A double bind is far worse than a straightforward damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don't dilemma. It requires you to obey two mutually exclusive commands: Anything you do to fulfill one violates the other.
YouTwoAnythingDoubleObeyFar
The word 'sister' evokes an ideal of connection and support, like the friendships that made Rebecca Wells's 'Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood' and Ann Brashares's 'The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants' into best-selling novels and successful films.
SupportSisterConnectionSecrets
We all feel wistfulness or regret about roads not taken.
RoadsRegretFeelTakenAbout
Mothers subject their daughters to a level of scrutiny people usually reserve for themselves. A mother's gaze is like a magnifying glass held between the sun's rays and kindling. It concentrates the rays of imperfection on her daughter's yearning for approval. The result can be a conflagration - whoosh.
MotherDaughterSunPeopleResult
We tend to assume that we have a baseline of speech that's going to be normal in all contexts, but the truth is, we all change our ways of speaking depending on who we're talking to. And so I think it's kind of a gesture of politeness to the people you're speaking to to try to say something in their own idiom.
ChangeTruthPeopleTruth IsThink
For many women, and a fair number of men, saying 'I'm sorry' isn't literally an apology; it's a ritual way of restoring balance to a conversation.
WomenMenBalanceSorrySayingWay
I can't tell you how many times I heard from younger sisters that their older sisters were bossy and judgmental.
YouTellJudgmentalOlderSisters
The meanings of words and the uses of words come from practice from the way people in a given culture use those words.
CultureWordsPracticePeopleWay
Now I am married to a man who is a partner and friend. We come from similar backgrounds and share values and interests. It is a continual source of pleasure to talk to him.
FriendManI AmPartnerValuesTalk
Asian cultures... place great value on avoiding open expression of disagreement and conflict because they emphasize harmony.
GreatValueConflictHarmonyPlace
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