British - Comedian | August 7, 1952 -
You can't do comedy with a beard.
Alexei Sayle
BeardComedyYou
People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.
WomenPeopleMotorcycleRichMore
Honestly, sometimes I get really fed up of my subconscious - it's like it's got a mind of its own.
MindSometimesUpOwnGetFed Up
Despite its flaws, Marxism still seems to explain the material world better than anything else.
WorldBetterFlawsExplainAnything
Americans have different ways of saying things. They say 'elevator', we say 'lift'... they say 'President', we say 'stupid psychopathic git.
StupidSayingLiftSayThey Say
But as in all cults, what's central to the Communist Party is the belief system and the elimination of nuance. From there you're very slowly led down the road to fanaticism and mass murder.
RoadYouDownPartyBeliefSystem
The journalists have obviously failed to capture my innate magnetism, humour and charisma, and they all need to be fired from their newspapers right away.
CaptureNeedRightHumourFired
It always seemed to be a constant that my parents were political.
ParentsPoliticalAlwaysConstant
Dire Straits is a great band. Someone tells you they like 'Brothers in Arms' and immediately you know they're a stupid annoying git.
GreatStupidSomeoneYouKnowBand
Recently, my personal advisors have been telling me to go to America. Actually, people have been walking up to me in the street and telling me to sod off, but that's the same thing, isn't it?
PeopleMeWalkingAmericaPersonal
If you travel to the States... they have a lot of different words than like what we use. For instance: they say 'elevator', we say 'lift'; they say 'drapes', we say 'curtains'; they say 'president', we say 'seriously deranged git.'
TravelWordsYouLiftSaySeriously
I'm an intellectual.
Intellectual
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