Alexandra Petri Quotes

American - Journalist | -

Success is like food caught in your teeth: much more noticeable when it happens to other people. If it happens to you, other people have to take you aside and say something.

Alexandra Petri

SuccessFoodPeopleYouSayTeeth

No matter how successful you are, no matter how good you are at what you do, even if a golden path rolls out in front of your feet your whole life, there will come one particularly bleak Tuesday when you glance over at Facebook and notice that Jen From Down The Hall has just won an Oscar.

Alexandra Petri

LifeGoodPathFeetYouDown

If you're doing what you do because you love it, you have room to be happy for others. And that's a lot of fun, when you get down to it.

Alexandra Petri

LoveFunHappyBe HappyDoingYou

You do not get gold stars for cleaning your toilet. In actual life, there is a depressing lack of stickers.

Alexandra Petri

LifeStarsGoldYouCleaningToilet

At Harvard, people like to impart the idea that you are a mover and shaker.

Alexandra Petri

PeopleYouHarvardIdeaLikeImpart

The worst thing that happens to you at college if you fail to get out of bed in time is that you will miss two hours of someone reading scintillating anecdotes about Medieval Ireland. The worst thing that happens to you in life if you fail to get out of bed in time is that you might lose your job as a first responder.

Alexandra Petri

LifeTimeJobCollegeReadingLose

At college, everyone's milestones occurred in shared clumps. Everyone studied, caroused, won, lost - simultaneously. Life is not like that.

Alexandra Petri

LifeCollegeLostMilestonesLike

Almost nothing anyone told me about Harvard has been accurate.

Alexandra Petri

MeNothingHarvardBeenAlmost

If you want to be famous because you do something well or badly, be it singing while fat or hitting balls of various shapes and hues, you have to be prepared to divulge. We live in the age of the chronic overshare.

Alexandra Petri

LiveAgeSingingFamousFatYou

The desire for attention has become a primal need along the lines of food, water, and clothing.

Alexandra Petri

WaterFoodAttentionDesireBecome

Every so often, when I am feeling plucky, I try to write a screenplay that combines all 10 of Americans' top phobias and market it as a sleeper hit.

Alexandra Petri

I AmFeelingTryWriteTopMarket

Forced to confront a reptile or an international financial crisis, I'll take the reptile every time.

Alexandra Petri

TimeFinancialCrisisTakeForced

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