Zach Galifianakis Quotes

We all know how funny Morrissey is. Actually, you know what? I say that sarcastically. His songs are some of the funniest songs I've ever heard in my life. I mean, really. I mean, not that the 'Girlfriend in a Coma' is, like, really funny.

Zach Galifianakis

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

  • Author Profession: actor
  • Nationality: american
  • Birth: October 1, 1969

Topics

LifeFunnyMy LifeYouKnowSay

Getting released in 2014 was the best thing that happened to me because I got to regain my focus, regain my pride, and come back as the best-conditioned athlete there is in WWE, which ultimately led me to become the single greatest WWE champion.

Jinder Mahal

BestFocusMeChampionPrideBack

The Bible is the rock on which this Republic rests.

Andrew Jackson

BibleRockRepublicWhichRests

If I ever play Hamlet, it'll be in a dress!

Matt Lucas

DressPlayEverHamlet

Governments can no longer control 100 percent of the story. Time and geographical boundaries disappear. In places like China and all over the Middle East, social-media outlets are being used to expose and hold accountable public officials that don't want to be held accountable for corruption and human rights abuses.

Amy Jo Martin

TimeControlStoryCorruptionWant

When I think of how things could have turned out, I feel as if I've dodged, not just bullets, but 6mm shells.

Tom Stoppard

ThinkFeelShellsOutThingsJust

I particularly like to make crunchy slices of garlic bread to serve with steamed clams.

Tom Douglas

BreadServeMakeLikeGarlic

I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it.

Rita Mae Brown

EnjoyAliveReasonOutFinallyOnly

It's always the small people who change things. It's never the politicians or the big guys. I mean, who pulled down the Berlin wall? It was all the people in the streets. The specialists didn't have a clue the day before.

Luc Besson

ChangeDayPeopleSmallDownWall

I've always respected Coach Frank. I kind of publicly recruited him because I really need him and want him. I'm kind of the college recruiter now because he brings a lot to the table. He's had success here and understands the good and the bad, so I'm recruiting him to join my staff.

Jason Kidd

SuccessGoodCollegeBadTableKind

What really fascinates me is this need that is so strong now that if you read a work of the imagination you instantly have to say, 'Oh, what this really is is so-and-so,' reducing it to a simple formula.

Doris Lessing

WorkSimpleImaginationMeStrong

With a mammogram - as great as they are, and they do save a lot of lives - if you have very dense breasts, it really can't see if there is something in there. There are other tests, including an MRI, that can really go into the tissue and really see cell formation and hot spots, and that's what you want to see before it becomes a tumor.

Christina Applegate

GreatYouGoWantHotSee

It's all about tuning out the noise, tuning out all the stuff that simply doesn't move the game forward - the doubt, the personal agendas, the often deafening fear of judgment and the need to please - so that you can ultimately get to that place of quiet, of calm, where you can focus on what really matters.

Bonnie Hammer

FearFocusCalmGameForwardYou

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