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Maria Bamford Quotes

As far as I can tell, comedians are pretty serious people, and that's why they make fun of things all of the time.

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Author Profession: comedian
Nationality: american
Birth: September 3, 1970

Topics

Time Fun People I Can Serious Why

Here at home, when Americans were standing in long lines to give blood after the attack on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, we squandered an obvious opportunity to make service a noble cause again, and rekindle an American spirit of community.

Home Opportunity Community Service

I have a 1969 Grammer Johnny Cash acoustic guitar, and it's so inspirational.

Inspirational Guitar Cash Acoustic

I hold religious tendencies, but I'm not devout by any means.

Hold Religious Means Any Devout

The Hogwarts houses are really gangs. They have their own colours, their own hideouts, and they are always riding for each other, like gangs.

Riding Always Own Like Gangs Houses

The Hamptons remind me of my childhood vacations. I love the beach, restaurants, and produce found on the East End.

Jean-Georges Vongerichten

Love Beach Childhood Me End Found

I can compete with anybody. I'm a true competitor. I'm a winner.

Winner I Can True Compete Competitor

I go back to a very specific aspect of the Midwest - small towns surrounded by farmland. They make a good stage for what I like to write about, i.e., roads and houses, bridges and rivers and weather and woods, and people to whom strange or interesting things happen, causing problems they must overcome.

Good Roads People Weather Small

I've got no hamstring in the middle. I'm basically running on two hamstrings on my right leg and three on the other. That injury has probably changed my whole career. I've been compromised from the age of 19.

Age Career Three Right Two Middle

Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble - you have to poke holes in them, throw them out of a job, put a pie in the face.

Job People Face Rich You Trouble

Whether wisely or not, one of the first priorities of the incoming Obama administration was to present a package of healthcare benefits, which, to no one's surprise, produced an uproar in Congress and an assortment of polls declaring that the majority of Americans were opposed to it.

Sherwin B. Nuland

Present Surprise Priorities Congress

I felt like I couldn't fully be myself and accepted in my family, so I would lock myself in my room on a Saturday night and watch 'Saturday Night Live,' and that was, like, the best thing that ever happened to me.

Family Live Myself Best Me Night

I don't like cattiness, or people who are too judgmental of others, or other situations.

Tyler Blackburn

People Others Judgmental Who Like

Copyright © 2024 QuotesDict Quote by Maria Bamford