Jasper Carrott Quotes

My driving habits are so ingrained that the driving examiner would fail me in the first mile. That's provided he hadn't died of a heart attack by then.

Jasper Carrott

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Topics

HeartMeDrivingFirstFailAttack

I am that 'everyman' in that I have made every mistake you can make in your career and in your personal life. But I am a survivor.

Joe Piscopo

LifeI AmMistakeYouCareerMade

AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals.

Jerry Falwell

GodSocietyPunishmentAIDSJust

There's nothing like 'Enlisted' fans. I mean, they really loved us.

Mel Rodriguez

LovedNothingMeanFansUsLike

I just played one of the bad guys in Hercules 3D, and I had cornrows. People moved away from me in elevators, that's for sure. I wore them for about three months. After a while, they get a little gnarly, and you have to redo them.

Johnathon Schaech

PeopleMeYouBadThreeLittle

What puzzles me is the way that some of the smaller, unknown chateaux imagine that because Chinese millionaires pay ludicrous sums for the great names, they can overcharge for their own inferior fluids. There is no trickledown effect in wine prices.

Simon Hoggart

GreatMeWineUnknownWayPay

I fell in love with 'Ben Hur' when I was 8 years old, and I just knew I had to be involved in movies, even if I was the guy who melted the butter on the popcorn.

Rod Lurie

LoveMoviesPopcornOldYearsGuy

My view is that marriage is a relationship between a man and a woman. That's the position I've had for some time, and I don't intend to make any adjustments at this point... Or ever, by the way.

Mitt Romney

MarriageRelationshipTimeWomanMan

Primaries are the place where you see whose message is connecting with the largest number of people.

Mitt Romney

PeopleYouPlaceSeeConnecting

I was born and raised in Lancaster, Pennsylvania - in Amish Country!

Jonathan Groff

BornCountryI Was BornRaisedAmish

Prior to being allowed to enter the profession, prospective teachers should be asked to talk with a group of friendly students for at least half an hour and be able to engage them in an interesting conversation about any subject the prospective teacher wants to talk about.

William Glasser

TeacherInterestingConversationTalk

Al Gore has all of the positive attributes of Bill Clinton but is saddled with none of his negatives. He's a great big teddy bear of a political figure - Teflon coated, road tested, and everyone's nice guy.

Peter Navarro

PositiveGreatRoadPoliticalNice

We already know that social security is more affordable in Scotland than it is in the rest of the U.K. - spending on social protection takes up a smaller share of our economic output and our tax revenues than is the case in the U.K. as a whole.

Nicola Sturgeon

RestSecurityTaxKnowMoreUp

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