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Lisa Lampanelli Quotes

I'm not a political comic at all, so it would be weird if I just turned into a preachy, sort-of political commentator.

Lisa Lampanelli

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Author Profession: comedian
Nationality: american
Birth: July 19, 1961

Topics

Weird Political Just Would Comic

Running for office is important, and you don't really need more than to be right on the issues, and to be able to articulate what it is you believe. You don't need a certain background. You don't need to be a lawyer. You don't need to have some professional degree.

Lawyer Believe You Professional Need

The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.

Law Advertising First Concrete Avoid

I am not politically correct. I am all about the facts, I am all about the truth and I am all about Godly pursuits and what this country was built on, and I am not apologetic about it.

Truth I Am Facts Country Built

There are literally as many ideas as there are organisms.

Ideas Many Literally Organisms

Pink cocktails look quite friendly. They have an umbrella in them, some sort of fruit... they look innocent, and boy, do they pack a punch.

Fruit Pink Look Innocent Boy Punch

The question we ask is - if there is life on other planets, should we expect it to be based on the same molecules, i.e. be universal - or should we expect it to depend on the local conditions, i.e. on the planet's geochemistry. So to find out, we try experiments on biomolecules, starting with such geochemistry conditions.

Dimitar Sasselov

Life Space Find Try Question Depend

I always wanted to be a professional player, but when I started playing well in Challengers and, for the first time, I did well at ATP tournaments, I saw that these guys are also beatable.

Time Professional First Time First

I realize that no one is going to come to me and ask me to be Julius Caesar or a romantic lead, but I think I'm a certain type of guy who looks a certain way, and that's just the reality of things.

Romantic Me Think Reality Looks Way

Regardless of what we look like on the outside, genetically, on the inside, everyone is an African.

Donald Johanson

Look Inside Outside Everyone Like

Let's just say beauty inspires me. But I like all beauty - I think it really comes from the inside out.

Donatella Versace

Beauty Me Think Say Inside Out

I once waited on a group of 10 people, and one guy collected the money from the check and tipped me $20 on $600. I told him in front of everyone, 'Jews like you give Jews like me a bad name.' That was my last waitressing job.

Chelsea Handler

Money Job People Me Name You

When I was in England doing Romeo and Juliet as a child star, I was interviewed by the British press, who are even more vicious and cruel than the Americans. So I have been extremely guarded ever since.

Child Doing More Cruel Star British

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