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Mitch Hedberg Quotes

An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.

Mitch Hedberg

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Author Profession: comedian
Nationality: american
Birth: February 24, 1968 - March 30, 2005

Topics

Sorry You Stairs Become Never See

A celibate, like the fly in the heart of an apple, dwells in a perpetual sweetness, but sits alone, and is confined and dies in singularity.

Jeremy Taylor

Heart Alone Fly Apple Sweetness

No state should have to endure the threat of terrorists entering our borders.

Matt Mead

Endure Borders Threat State Our

I had two DVDs my junior year. One was 'Fletch' and one was 'Goodfellas,' and I watched those movies so much. I just remember eating Ramen noodles and watching 'Goodfellas.'

Jeff Nichols

Eating Remember Year Movies Watching

I'm certainly not who people think I am. I always do whatever I want to do, and my films are personal to me.

Steven Rodney McQueen

I Am People Me Think Want Personal

Hiphop has remained in an infantile stage and has not been allowed to grow.

Slick Rick

Grow Stage Been Allowed Infantile

Our job as actors is to just try to be as accurate and as mindful of what the audience is going through and receiving and processing.

Jason Bateman

Job Try Audience Through Going Just

I think there is a lot of experiences you have in coaching, and if you learn from the experiences as you go through them, whether it's as a coordinator or position coach, a quality-control coach, a head coach, whatever it might be, and you learn from those mistakes you make.

Josh McDaniels

Mistakes Think Learn Coaching You

What I do doesn't sit well in the world of hipsterville. I don't have a cool card, but I also don't have thin skin.

Chris Daughtry

Cool World Skin Sit Well Thin

If Barack Obama weren't a U.S. citizen, I'm sure Bill and Hillary Clinton would have figured that out by now.

Cory Gardner

Now Citizen Out Sure Would Were

I'm not a great writer of literature. I'm an entertainer.

Clive Cussler

Great Literature Writer Entertainer

I don't do every song that comes my way; I'm very choosy.

Bonnie Tyler

Song Way Every Very Choosy

I never think any song really feels like a 'hit' - a song either feels good or bad, in my opinion.

Astrid S

Good Opinion Song Think Bad Never