Michael Showalter Quotes

For me, Twitter works best as a way of taking pictures of being stuck in traffic on the Brooklyn Bridge. If people really want to read really funny quips about life, parenting, and pop culture, then by all means read Michael Ian Black's tweets.

Michael Showalter

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Topics

LifeFunnyBestCultureParenting

I don't know what goes on behind my back... I always feel like, if you don't have anything good to say, then don't say anything.

Amy Heckerling

GoodFeelYouBackKnowSay

I can still dance a little, yes, but I like singing better. It's more fun.

Stanley Donen

DanceFunSingingBetterI CanMore

You have to give directors and cinematographers a word blueprint for visuals, but I had to learn that from experience.

Steven Bochco

ExperienceLearnYouGiveBlueprint

Le Mans is such a great race because you can never do anything alone. You have to work as a team member. And being a team member makes you a better person.

Tom Kristensen

WorkAloneGreatTeamBetter Person

I'm no enthusiast for the Coase Theorem. I don't like it, but it's widely used.

Ronald Coase

UsedLikeEnthusiastTheoremWidely

I don't spend a lot of time in the mirror.

Julia Roberts

TimeMirrorLotSpend

Since having kids, I am more careful about saving rather than splurging. I used to spend all my money on trainers and high heels that I couldn't walk in.

Jasmine Guinness

MoneyWalkI AmHigh HeelsHigh

My ambition is peace and perfection.

DeForest Kelley

PeacePerfectionAmbition

Kiss me and you will see how important I am.

Sylvia Plath

RomanticI AmKissMeYouImportant

Being on stage is, like, my favorite. The immediate gratification. That's my favorite.

Tiffany Haddish

StageBeingFavoriteLikeImmediate

It crossed our minds early on that the more an audience cared - we were working before, on average, 240, live people. If you could get them caring - the more they cared, the harder they laughed.

Norman Lear

LiveCaringPeopleYouEarlyMinds

My idea of going to hell is going somewhere where there are no books.

James MacArthur

HellSomewhereWhereGoingIdea

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