Michelle Wolf Quotes

I think I'm a good joke writer. I'm also very scared that the last joke I wrote is the last joke I'll ever write.

Michelle Wolf

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Topics

GoodThinkWriteJokeScaredLast

Back then, I, most rockers loved Chuck Berry, Little Richard, Jerry Lee Lewis... you know in the '60s.

Joe Cocker

LovedYouBackKnowLittleMost

I believe in $15 as a minimum wage.

Andrew Cuomo

BelieveI BelieveMinimum WageWage

Yeah, I'm a geek. I read sci-fi and I watch sci-fi films. I love my computer and I love to fix it. I'm a total nerd. I literally am a 12-year-old geeky boy trapped in a 32-year-old woman's body.

Amber Benson

LoveWomanBodyBoyTrappedFix

One of my earliest lessons in guilt was imparted in childhood through the story of the death of Mahatma Gandhi's father.

Amitava Kumar

FatherChildhoodDeathStoryGuilt

I don't think I'll ever be able to grow a beard.

Tom Odell

BeardThinkGrowAbleEver

We want to get to the point that using Uber is cheaper than owning a car.

Travis Kalanick

CarWantPointGetUberCheaper

Protestants so often confuse being Republican with being Christian.

Tony Campolo

ChristianRepublicanBeingConfuse

I don't think I was considered to be a cabaret singer because I didn't have patter that was written.

Rita Coolidge

ThinkSingerBecauseCabaretWritten

For some time, Scotland's greatest exports to England have included whisky and Scottish MPs. Or, in the case of Charles Kennedy, both. All these links, politically, economically, culturally, are part of my Union. Would Glasgow's brilliant Commonwealth Games or the Edinburgh Festival be any better for our being independent? I doubt it.

Rory Bremner

TimeBetterDoubtIndependentGames

At the time of my second marriage, my husband was in his early 50s, I was in my mid-40s, and we each had two kids. We maintained our individual accounts and opened one for the house. We each kick the same percentage of our incomes into the house account and have a joint credit card. But we pay for our children separately.

Jean Chatzky

MarriageChildrenTimeHusbandEarly

I've appeared three times on 'The Good Wife.' I'm proud of being associated with the show. 'Time' magazine called it 'the best thing on TV outside cable.' Did I mention that I also appear on cable?

Donna Brazile

GoodTimeBestWifeProudThree

Because 'Friends' is on Netflix, there's a renewed interest from that... People can call me 'Ben' on the street, and I will turn around.

Cole Sprouse

PeopleMeFriendsStreetNetflix

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