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Rita Rudner Quotes

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one.

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Author Profession: comedian
Nationality: american
Birth: September 17, 1955

Topics

Busy Bank Two Local Except Very

There are people who make things happen, there are people who watch things happen, and there are people who wonder what happened. To be successful, you need to be a person who makes things happen.

Success People You Wonder Person

Oh, I try to stay as far away from karaoke as humanly possible!

Far Away Possible Try Stay Karaoke

I had better cellular coverage on a ship in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea than I have in many parts of Silicon Valley.

Sea Ship Better Valley Middle Than

We do a very good job at fixing broken bodies but not such a great job at healing broken minds with our returning veterans.

Good Great Job Broken Healing Minds

Yet I've discovered that how I look is not a function of anything as ephemeral as my hair.

Hair Look Anything Function How

It's kind of ironic that the two sports with the greatest characters, boxing and horse racing, have both been on the decline. In both cases it's for the lack of a suitable hero.

Sports Hero Racing Horse Kind Two

I face every project the same way - do it right and give 110%. 100% isn't good enough.

Good Face Enough Way Project Right

Well, the right-wing policy with regard to Israel - the people who don't want to deal with Arafat, who don't want a Palestinian state - the whole sort of right-wing view is consistent with the view toward Iraq. It's the same policy and the same people.

People View Want Same Policy Israel

I used to work at a school as a teacher's assistant, and my mom is a principal at an elementary school. I don't know, I think that's a pretty good life, teaching kids.

Life Work Good Teacher School Mom

I like Nirvana, but I couldn't say that I was influenced by them. I like to tell a story.

Story Say Tell Nirvana Like Them

Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother's love is not.

Family Love Mother Love Is World

All that pop that you see on the radio? It's just the worst crud I've ever heard in my life. It's designed to make money, and that's about it.

Life Money My Life You Worst Radio

Copyright © 2024 QuotesDict Quote by Rita Rudner