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Steven Wright Quotes

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Author Profession: comedian
Nationality: american
Birth: December 6, 1955

Topics

Good Morning Mistakes Sleep Me You

It's very strange to go from being completely secluded and doing your own work for yourself, to having an audience - and having an audience that's aware of what you do and expects you to do things that they like. It can make things difficult.

Work Yourself Doing You Go Strange

We need to teach our children empathy and care and love and communication and social responsibility in preparation for adulthood.

Maya Soetoro-Ng

Love Communication Children Empathy

I've always been fascinated and stared at maps for hours as a kid. I've especially been most intrigued by the uninhabited or lonelier places on the planet. Like Greenland, for instance, or just recently flying over Alaska and a chain of icy, mountainous islands, uninhabited.

Flying Places Alaska Kid Over Maps

I've become more relaxed. When I was younger, I had more erratic, nervous tension when I was working.

Nervous Become More Tension Working

When all my kids were at home, I used to write from midnight onwards.

Home Write Midnight Used Kids Were

As someone who has owned a small business in the past, I understand how difficult it can be to get a loan.

Business Past Small Someone Loan

Everybody cheats on the Kardashians.

Everybody Cheats

I remember clearly watching a 'Sooty Show' at a theatre and telling my mum I wanted to be up with the puppets, not in the audience.

Theatre Remember Watching Clearly Up

Two roads diverged in a wood and I - I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.

Inspirational Roads Traveled Wood

When you raise taxes on small business, from 35% to 40%, you will kill jobs.

Business Small You Will Taxes Raise

What I want is to be well-respected around all ages and all around the world.

Lucky Blue Smith

World Want Around Ages

Before YouTube, I used to show videos at film festivals, and that was good and constructive. Watching things with an audience is a great way to gauge - it's pretty clear what's working in comedy when there's a joke and people laugh or don't laugh.

Good Great People Laugh Comedy Way

Copyright © 2024 QuotesDict Quote by Steven Wright