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Steven Wright Quotes

Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Author Profession: comedian
Nationality: american
Birth: December 6, 1955

Topics

People Night House Late Cards Up

For years, comprehensive tax reform has eluded legislators.

Tax Years Reform Comprehensive

Congress has taken an action now that makes it absolutely improper and illegal to use waterboarding... or any other form of torture by our military and by our other departments and agencies.

Action Congress Now Military Torture

The New Orleans I knew ain't no more.

New More New Orleans Knew Orleans

Progress for black Americans depends on good schools because education is the last great equalizer.

Alphonso Jackson

Education Good Great Progress Black

I'm not possessed about owning the Buffalo Bills, just as I wasn't possessed about owning the Buffalo Sabres.

Buffalo Owning Just Bills About

I want a hit. I don't think anybody spends 12 months writing and recording an album, making something cool, and says, 'Great, I hope this doesn't sell.' I don't understand that mind-set. I want hits: a big bunch of them.

Robbie Williams

Hope Great Cool Writing Think Want

There's something depressing about a young couple helplessly in love. Their state is so perfect, it must be doomed. They project such qualities on their lover that only disappointment can follow.

Love Disappointment Perfect Young

Our European allies need to be able to buy our fuel, or they will fall to enemy domination.

Fall Enemy Will Need Buy Domination

Starting out as young women, we didn't care that people thought that we were a fad or if people thought we didn't dress girly enough - we were just like, 'Whatever.' We were able to accomplish that with three totally different girls, in a group.

Women Dress People Thought Care

The older I get, the more I surf and do more stretches to get ready for the rock show.

Ready Rock More Show Get Older

I don't keep any copy of my books around... they would embarass me. When I finish writing my books, I kick them in the belly, and have done with them.

Ludwig Bemelmans

Me Writing Copy Done Finish Kick

So to me, Texas Hold 'em puts me to sleep. At least when you play stud, you can be funny as you deal. Somebody some day is going to come up with a Stud show that's going to work.

Work Funny Day Sleep Me Texas

Copyright © 2024 QuotesDict Quote by Steven Wright