Matt Groening Quotes

I went to Bali, and I was in a small village, and somebody who was with me showed a woman a little figurine of Bart and asked: 'Do you know who this is?' And she said: 'Mickey Mouse.'

Matt Groening

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Topics

WomanMeSmallMickey MouseYouShe

OK, I've made a preposterous amount of money. But I was born with the attributes needed to do it.

John Caudwell

MoneyBornI Was BornMadeOK

'Give me your poor.' It didn't say, 'Give me your poor who can afford a $680 citizenship.' If I had my way, it would be free. If I had my way, the state would subsidize every eligible application, period.

Andrew Cuomo

MeFreeCitizenshipSayWayPoor

From fear to bonding with the audience to getting more open - that's what standup is. It humanises you.

Maysoon Zayid

FearYouMoreOpenAudienceBonding

I had disagreements with all my neighbors about my dogs. I had a disagreement with myself about my dogs. They were noisy.

John McAfee

MyselfNeighborsDogsDisagreement

It seems to me that Sotheby's is very much like the British monarchy: an old and apparently very venerable institution which is in fact very nimble on its feet, an institution invested with a great deal more self-interest than the public image would suggest.

Robert Lacey

GreatMeFeetMoreOldImage

Being described as a stupid bureaucrat with no link to representative democracy is difficult to take.

Jean-Claude Juncker

DemocracyStupidDifficultTakeLink

All of the legal defense funds out there, they're looking for people out there with court of appeals experience, because court of appeals is where policy is made. And I know, I know this is on tape and I should never say that because we don't make law, I know. I know.

Sonia Sotomayor

ExperiencePeopleLawLookingLegal

Be as you wish to seem.

Socrates

WisdomWishYouSeem

I've tried writing darker, more serious songs, but they don't go anywhere. Everything revolves around the chorus for me.

Shura

MeWritingGoSeriousMoreTried

Two things Florida can teach the other 49 states: how to make a good margarita and how to deal with the aftermath of a hurricane.

Tom Feeney

GoodTeachTwoFloridaThingsDeal

I do detest everything which is not perfectly mutual.

Lord Byron

EverythingMutualWhichDetest

Be well dressed, behave like a gentleman, and keep your shoes shined.

Joseph Abboud

ShoesGentlemanDressedBehaveWell

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