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Maz Jobrani Quotes

As a Middle Eastern male, I know there's certain things I'm not supposed to say on an airplane in the U.S., right? I'm not supposed to be walking down the aisle, and be like, 'Hi, Jack.' That's not cool. Even if I'm there with my friend named Jack, I say, 'Greetings, Jack. Salutations, Jack.' Never 'Hi, Jack.'

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

Author Profession: comedian
Nationality: american
Birth: February 26, 1972

Topics

Friend Cool Airplane Walking Down

Tinder - man, what's that all about? Tinder, where you're just, like, shopping for a human being. Reading the stats like 'Mortal Kombat.' You're like, 'Oh, he's got six arms, and he's only got the two, so I'll probably go with the six arms.' I don't want to do that with human beings.

Man Shopping Reading You Go Want

Oh yes, I certainly have low days. I feel that in treating the depression, it's not so much that I've become happier as it is that I can be unhappy in better ways.

Depression Better Feel Unhappy I Can

Guernsey itself was overcrowded, but its cliffs were utterly empty. I spent a wonderful year with a friend, climbing them. It was sheer magic: you went from this pretty, busy village of an island to the sea cliffs and heard nothing but the gulls and the waves.

Friend Sea Waves Busy Magic Year

I do my best creating on stage.

Best Creating Stage

In the immigration debate, some things are constant. They never change. One is that opponents of immigration reform will use it as a wedge issue and will blame everything from unemployment to rising health care costs on immigrants.

Change Health Blame Care Immigration

Before I even pick up a guitar, usually the words are done. So I'm not first and foremost a musician. I'm first and foremost a writer.

Words Guitar Done First Up Even

I love 'Bringing Up Baby.' Anything that Katharine Hepburn's in. I'm committed to the Humphrey Bogart, Cary Grant, Katharine Hepburn era of filmmaking.

Love Baby Filmmaking Up Anything

If you're passionate about something, you can develop the abilities.

You Passionate Something Develop

The most successful people I've worked with, like the Rolling Stones - people of a different, kind of legendary caliber - have such great, warm energy.

Christina Aguilera

Great People Energy Warm Kind

I think that's something that's hard for this country to address, is what the real issues are and coming to the point where we can admit that these are issues. Once we admit that, we can deal with it, we can fix them, and we can make this country and these communities a better place.

Colin Kaepernick

Think Better Country Admit Place

As an Englishwoman, you pick up a lot through osmosis. I've been watching the Queen all my life. But, yes, I did watch news footage and was able to pick a couple of little tics. For instance, she plays with her hands a lot and has a certain way of holding them on her lap when she's in public.

Life Queen My Life Hands You News

I write the black experience in America, and contained within that experience, because it is a human experience, are all the universalities.

Experience Black America Human Write

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