Joan Rivers Quotes

Every comedian is furious. Age makes me angry. I'm unhappy at not being able to open packages anymore. I'm angry that libraries have gone. I hate children on planes. I'm very shallow, so they tend to be little things. To be honest, I think I was probably angry the day I was born, you know, about diapers or something.

Joan Rivers

Recitation: by Male by Female

Author Biography

  • Author Profession: comedian
  • Nationality: american
  • Birth: June 8, 1933 - September 4, 2014

Topics

AgeChildrenHateDayAngryMe

Confront your fears, list them, get to know them, and only then will you be able to put them aside and move ahead.

Jerry Gillies

YouKnowAheadWillMoveGet

Follow your passion. Be yourself, but check yourself before you wreck yourself.

Andy Cohen

PassionYourselfBe YourselfYou

I'm a geek to the bone.

Jeff Dunham

BoneGeek

Without obsession, life is nothing.

John Waters

LifeNothingObsessionWithout

I'm a born entertainer. When I open the fridge door and the light goes on, I burst into song.

Robbie Williams

LightDoorSongBornOpenFridge

Iran with a nuclear weapon or with fissile material that can be given to Hezbollah or Hamas or others has the potential of not just destabilizing the Middle East. But it could be brought here.

Mitt Romney

PotentialOthersHereMiddleJust

A sitcom isn't usually the right tool for satire.

Chris Morris

RightSatireToolSitcom

Sense of smell, of course, is only one of those dog qualities that can't be replicated or improved upon. I've been researching dogs in warfare for my book about 'Rin Tin Tin,' and I've read many accounts of their heroics: carrying messages through battle, alerting troops to enemy planes, and even parachuting behind enemy lines.

Susan Orlean

DogBookBattleEnemySmellDogs

There's no such thing as an independent person.

Peter Jennings

IndependencePersonIndependentThing

When enough people care about autism or diabetes or global warming, it helps everyone, even if only a tiny fraction actively participate.

Seth Godin

PeopleCareEnoughDiabetesEveryone

We never really tried to shock for shock's sake on 'Family Guy'. If something was horribly offensive and shocking, we would put it in if it was also hysterically funny.

Seth MacFarlane

FamilyFunnyNeverOffensiveGuy

Rough diamonds may sometimes be mistaken for worthless pebbles.

Thomas Browne

DiamondsBrainySometimesWorthless

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