American - Comedian | September 3, 1957 -
Kids don't come with an instruction manual. So if you're gonna make mistakes, at least make them your own way.
Steve Schirripa
MistakesYouWayOwnComeKids
I've worked too hard all my life to have my kids control my life.
LifeControlMy LifeHardKidsToo
I tell my kids, 'I'm your father, not your friend - but I'm also the best friend you're ever going to have because no one is going to care for you the way I care about you.'
FriendFatherBestBest FriendCare
I'm not big with negotiating.
BigNegotiating
'Because I said so!' They are the most underrated four words.
WordsSaidBecauseUnderratedFour
Sometimes being a dad is like watching a ping-pong match.
SometimesWatchingBeingLikeMatch
I'd like to form a club just for fathers. Specifically, fathers of daughters. There would be lots of overstuffed leather chairs, wood paneling, dim lights. The works.
LightsWoodLeatherClubJustWould
I gotta say, as the father of two beautiful young daughters, I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth.
FatherBeautifulMyselfManFace
Being the father of girls is a kind of illness, in its own way - since any guy who has tried to live in a house with a wife and two daughters is, without any doubt, going to go certifiably nuts.
FatherLiveWifeDoubtHouseKind
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