American - Journalist | September 22, 1966 -
'Uff da,' for the unenlightened, is Norwegian for 'oy vey' and is a common expression in Minnesotese.
Steve Rushin
ExpressionCommonNorwegian
When people ask if Marquette University is in Michigan, and I tell them my alma mater is in Milwaukee, they sometimes say, 'What's the difference?'
PeopleSometimesSayAskDifference
I spent a year slaving over a hot rollergrill in a Metrodome concession stand and watched the World Series there - and a Super Bowl and a Final Four. I can honestly say - regardless of outcome - that I left every game floating on air.
WorldGameStandYearI CanSay
The Metrodome was built for football. Fans seated down the third-base line at a baseball game faced centerfield, so that they had to turn and look over their right shoulders to see home plate.
HomeFootballBaseballGameLook
Yes, sports are very often very boring, which is good and necessary: If games were one long highlight, we wouldn't have any highlights at all.
GoodSportsLongBoringGamesYes
In any other context, 'icing' is a great and exciting word: The proverbial icing on the cake, for instance, is a bonus - a wonderful thing on top of another wonderful thing. But in hockey, icing merely results in the referee's raising his right hand, as if swearing an oath to the deity of downtime.
GreatCakeHockeyResultsHandTop
Baseball consists of a million threads of dullness, on a loom of ennui, woven into a tapestry of tedium.
BaseballWovenMillionTapestryLoom
Compassion and empathy are anathema to sports.
SportsCompassionEmpathyAnathema
Occasionally, Americans in large numbers are moved by a vanquished athlete's grief. Larry Bird with a towel over his head in 1979 comes immediately to mind. But more often, sports fans do the opposite - they delight in the desolation of a defeated archrival.
SportsBirdGriefMindNumbersMore
Hype covers every surface of mass culture, and sports fans are intimately familiar with it - the heavy-breathing buildup that leads, inevitably, to a first-round knockout or a 30-point blowout or a fourth-inning rainout.
SportsCultureHypeFansSurface
Hype is supposed to overpromise and underdeliver, not overpromise and overdeliver. Usually, it doesn't deliver at all - it takes your money and keeps your pizza.
MoneyPizzaHypeYourDeliverTakes
The phrase 'NFL combine' always sounds redundant, because the league is a combine harvester, reaping and threshing everything in its path.
PathAlwaysEverythingNFLBecause
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