American - Poet | 1976 -
I envy my Jewish friends the ritual of saying kaddish - a ritual that seems perfectly conceived, with its built-in support group and its ceremonious designation of time each day devoted to remembering the lost person.
Meghan O'Rourke
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This is part of the complexity of grief: A piece of you recognizes it is an extreme state, an altered state, yet a large part of you is entirely subject to its demands.
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I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious.
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But when my mother died, I found that I did not believe that she was gone.
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The truth is, I need to experience my mother's presence in the world around me and not just in my head.
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Like my mother before me, I have always been a good speller.
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'Hamlet' is the best description of grief I've read because it dramatizes grief rather than merely describing it.
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'Hamlet' is a play about a man whose grief is deemed unseemly.
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Loss is so paradoxical: It is at once enormous and tiny.
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I believe in the importance of individuality, but in the midst of grief I also find myself wanting connection - wanting to be reminded that the sadness I feel is not just mine but ours.
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A mother is beyond any notion of a beginning. That's what makes her a mother.
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I live to collect information, and I am also a perfectionist.
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