American - Author | September 13, 1938 -
'Honesty' in social life is often used as a cover for rudeness. But there is quite a difference between being candid in what you're talking about, and people voicing their insulting opinions under the name of honesty.
Judith Martin
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Freedom without rules doesn't work. And communities do not work unless they are regulated by etiquette.
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When people start hurling insults at you, you know their minds are closed and there's no point in debating. You disengage yourself as quickly as possible from the situation.
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The language of clothing is high symbolism and we all, in moments where we need to know this, realize it.
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Etiquette does not render you defenseless. If it did, even I wouldn't subscribe to it. But rudeness in retaliation for rudeness just doubles the amount of rudeness in the world.
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Etiquette is all human social behavior. If you're a hermit on a mountain, you don't have to worry about etiquette; if somebody comes up the mountain, then you've got a problem. It matters because we want to live in reasonably harmonious communities.
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Many people mistakenly think a new technology cancels out an old one.
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It's far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
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The greater the controversy, the more you need manners.
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Hypocrisy is not generally a social sin, but a virtue.
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One of the big no-nos in cyberspace is that you do not go into a social activity, a chat group or something like that, and start advertising or selling things. This etiquette rule is an attempt to separate one's social life, which should be pure enjoyment and relaxation, from the pressures of work.
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When a society abandons its ideals just because most people can't live up to them, behavior gets very ugly indeed.
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