English - Comedian | November 27, 1954 -
It's worth turning up to an awards gig if you know you've won one but, since you never do know, it's not worth it.
Arthur Smith
WorthYouKnowNeverAwardsUp
Theatricals can be irritating, but will provide a better night out than mobile phone salespeople.
NightBetterPhoneWillOutMobile
Ninety-eight per cent of laughter is nothing to do with jokes, which do not deserve to bear the weight of all the funny stuff in the world.
FunnyLaughterWorldNothingDeserve
I find it hilarious that there are academics who try to analyse chemical changes in the brains of students while exposing them to gags.
FindTryChangesStudentsBrains
When they meet a stand-up comic, people sometimes remark: 'That must be the hardest job in the world.' Among comedians, only Freddie Starr is not embarrassed and slightly appalled by this remark.
JobPeopleWorldSometimesMeet
I myself am pathetically impressed when I meet writers of very long novels. How can they spend so many hundreds of hours at the miserable, lonely pastime of creating fiction?
MyselfLonelyLongCreatingMeet
The book may be garbage, but if it weighs in at a kilo or more, I stand before its author in awe.
BookStandMoreGarbageAweMay
If you want to write something of length, however modern and radical, you must live the life of an elderly gentleman of the 1950s.
LifeLiveGentlemanYouWantWrite
Sometimes it's good to do something that you've never done before, so yesterday, I went out to buy Elton John's new album.
GoodYouYesterdayNewSometimes
Sometimes it's bad to do something you've never done before.
YouBadDoneSometimesNeverBefore
Travel books are, by and large, boring. They lodge uncomfortably between fact, fiction and autobiography.
TravelBoringFictionAutobiography
Occasionally I find a travel book that is both illuminating and entertaining, where vivid writing and research replace self-indulgence and sloppy prose.
TravelResearchWritingBookFind
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