American - Writer | -
To believe that your husband, wife, parents, kids, boss, job, bank account, or body is even partly responsible for your emotions, to think that there are bullets 'out there' that you have to contend with, that there are stressful life events to overcome, is to miss something vital.
Andrew J. Bernstein
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The reason humans experience so much more stress than other species isn't just because we think more, but also because we think differently.
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If you're successful and stressed out, you're succeeding in spite of your stress, not because of it.
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Some people are so used to experiencing stress that they don't remember what life was like without it.
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Stress is a byproduct of subconscious beliefs you have about the world. You can't choose not to believe something. You believe it because you think it's true. To eliminate stress, you must learn to challenge these beliefs so that you see them differently.
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When a friend is sick, I see the situation for what it is, not what it isn't, and I offer to help as much as she wants, not as much as I want.
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Find the beliefs that are strangling your feelings, challenge them for your sake as well as theirs, and see how it feels to love someone without a thought about the future, simply for who they are today.
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Stress is not the spice of life any more than arsenic is. And without it, you won't feel bored.
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The elusive truth is that there is nothing stress-producing in the physical world. Things simply are. Molecules move. Light and sound appear.
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You can't tell yourself that your stress is produced in your head and feel better. You still need to learn how to create a change.
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You might think that shifting your thoughts is as easy as setting your mind to it. But stressful thoughts aren't held in place through choice or will power. They're held in place through perceived truth value.
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The less you think counterfactually, the less you experience stress. Stress, in this light, isn't a bad thing. It's simply a warning system telling you that your mind has lost touch with what's real.
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